Thank you

Over the last month, and on a couple of other occasions over the last year and a half, I have been struggling with an extremely painful condition, called pyoderma gangrenosum. As I have already said previously, DO NOT look this up without being forewarned that images are quite graphic (actually there is a picture of me in Google Images also..and that is of my face and that is the most hideous of all!).

During this time, I was essentially immobilized. Confined to bed, where pain was constant, not touched by Ibuprofen, Oxycodone, Percocets or Vicodin. The pain in my leg ranged from local wound pain, to general malaise to outright VIOLENT spasms where my entire leg felt as if it was set aflame. I had to sleep on my back, with my leg practically in a vertical position. This would help a little, except at some point, I needed to put my leg below my heart and the searing pain would begin again as any sign of healing was quickly negated by the curse of gravity.

I could handle the pain, somewhat, but managing the wound itself was an endlessly nasty endeavor that required a TON of dressings that need to be painfully changed a few times per day. Each dressing change lasting more than 20 minutes. On more than one occasion, my doctor wanted to admit me because the problem was only getting worse.

The other problem is having to subject my family to all this. The Baby Goats have seen me at my worst. I know that has caused a lot of stress for them and I have missed out on some big events over the last month.

In case you are missing it, I am using the past tense in my words above. I am on some insane drugs that are essentially trying to reboot my immune system and the wound is virtually healed. I AM OFFICIALLY FEELING MUCH BETTER! Who knows, I am even considering going for a (quick) jog tomorrow morning.

I am writing this post, not to make you sick to your stomach. I do that with my other posts.

During this extremely difficult time, the one constant ray of sunshine that beamed into my days and nights was your well wishes. On more than one occasion, I would receive a perfectly timed comment or email asking if I was OK. I simply want you all to know that those comments and check-ins meant the world to me. I wasn’t dying from this horrible condition, but I certainly wished for it and your words helped me more than you will ever know.

This condition is subsiding now. My leg has yet another scar on it that looks like I sat on a scalding hot radiator. I am being treated rather vigorously with heavy meds but this damned condition can flare up at any point again, in weeks, months or years. But as I sit here, reflecting on the last month, I quite simply need to thank all of you for your kind words and friendship. I am forever stunned at the relationships that can develop while blogging.

I admit to being very selfish. The posts I write are nothing more than a ploy; a ploy to get you to come back.  I write in order to be with you and I write in order to read your words.

Thank you, my friends.