But, there is also a list of things we probably use every day that either are truly useless or don’t even serve their original purpose. The list below is just a short list of things I could think of.
The I-Want-to-Walk Button found at intersections - This is just another one of those devises that are put there in order to give people a sense of control over their lives when in fact the buttons are utterly useless. Have you ever pushed the walk button and had it do anything? (thanks to Terri for this one!)
The hot water in a public restroom - We all know this one. You are washing your hands after finishing your business and you can plainly see that the faucet has the ability to deliver both hot and cold water and all temperatures in between. But have you EVER actually had hot water come out? Part of the problem is that you are usually not in the mood to simply linger there in order to decipher all the different ways that you can turn the dial while pushing down while not picking up more germs than you are washing off. But I am still not convinced that hot water even gets piped into these places.
The Close Door button on an elevator - You might as well paint a circle on the wall and tell people to push it, it would be just as pointless as the Close Door button. Joe, the Elevator Guy, had these installed just to give people something to play with for the next 8 seconds until the door opens again and it is time to have someone else play with the button.
The thermostat found in most public places, especially conference rooms and hotel rooms. Every room in my office building has one of these thermostats and they all do nothing. Oh they have pretty slider switches with blue at one end and red at the other. Sounds promising. But, this is just another ploy to make you think you have some control in your lives , but by the time you adjust the thermostat and wait for the room to warm up or cool down, your meeting is over and it is time to go to another room and play the game again. I am quite certain that those thermostats are connected to nothing.
Exhaust Fans in bathrooms - I am not sure what they are “exhausting” but it appears to do nothing. Perhaps their only purpose is to create a white noise for those suffering from “performance anxiety.”
90% of the buttons of any remote control - I consider myself fairly gadget-savvy and actually enjoy reading the User’s Guides, but I own one television set, and 5 remote controls for it! I have mastered the fine art of turning on the power with one and adjusting the volume with the other and ejecting the DVD with the a third and, all while not looking at the remote. But, as I am looking at the remotes now, I realize I do not use 90% of the buttons. What the hell is “format’ or that one button that has nothing on it except for the letter “R”?
Any other button on the blender that is not On/Off. When you are sending steel blades spinning at supersonic speeds, does it really matter if it is as “Puree” or “Frappe” or “Crush” or “Mix” or “Blend?” What the hell is the difference? Everything is being spun into a pulp!
Coin pockets on jeans - I am assuming that the days of carrying a watch on a fob and tucking it into a small pocket are over. If I am wrong, then perhaps that little pocket can be useful. First of all, I don’t own change. Second, when I do have change, it doesn’t fit into that little pocket.
Child Safety Caps on bottles - Face it, we live in a world where children emerge from the birth canal already thumb-enabled. Evolution has stepped in and accommodated the power thumbs necessary for future survival on this planet. Our children are the first generation to notice a shift from our hunter-gatherer hands used to pick berries from vines to a more thumb-centric approach needed to handle the game counsels of the future. My prediction is that automobiles of the future will be driven by our thumbs. My 4 year old can open a vitamin bottle more quickly than I can.
The micro-mini tabs at the top of cereal boxes supposedly to allow for reclosing, clearly designed for no purpose since it is instantly torn off as soon as you try to get through the tamper-proof gorilla glue they stick boxes together with.
Picture holders that come with wallets and purses - I have never seen one that can accommodate ANY picture I own. I buy a wallet and throw out the picture holder and then get yelled at when I don’t have a picture of my Baby Goats handy (depite the fact that I have 6 billion pictures on Flickr).
The Insert, Scroll Lock, Home and End buttons on a PC - Again, they do nothing.
The Reverse Switch on ceiling fans - I know all about hot air rising, blah blah blah, but when you live in a shoebox, like I do, the only thing a ceiling fan does is BLOW AIR! It does not make a difference which direction it is blowing. The instructions so smugly tell us that there is a summer setting and a winter setting. when I have 20 foot ceilings and I am paying for all my heat to rest 20 feet over my head, then I will consider it. Otherwise, the fan simply moves air.
Any preset button on a microwave - You know the ones “Popcorn”, “Potato”, “Frozen Pizza.” The settings are all completely arbitrary and have no basis in reality. When I put something into the microwave, ANYTHING, I push the Popcorn button and walk away. If it needs to stay in longer, I push it again. If it needed less time, then I am quickly reminded why I hate microwave ovens.
Anything added to dishwashing liquid that is not soap - this includes microbeads and moisturizers.
And the last one is just a personal rant - THE STRAW. In the big cosmic picture, what does a straw do? Are we really so lazy that we can’t bring the cup to our face? I guess if you have a lot of ice cubes, then the straw prevents you from smashing your teeth with them, but that seems rather dubious.
Question for Both of My Readers (BoMR): What everyday device is useless to you?