As a wise man once said:
A morning without coffee is like sleep.
I admit that I am a coffee snob. I don’t have two pennies to rub together but I subscribe to a monthly delivery of Gevalia Cofee. Not only is this a great way to get a free coffee maker out of the deal, but it truly is superior coffee. At precisely 5 AM, my coffee maker comes to life just before I do and grinds and then brews my coffee. My taste buds are so refined that I can distinguish between the pure joy of my morning brew and the utter swill in my cafeteria at work.
On that rant, I wanted to “espress” two of my biggest pet peeves regarding coffee:
- The heavenly infusion of fine ground coffee and hot water under pressure is called “ESPRESSO”, it is not “expresso.” Someone working in a coffee shop actually corrected me and said that is how it is pronounced in English. WHAT!?
- When I am paying nearly two dollars at Starbucks for two ounces of liquid, please do not automatically assume that I wanted it “to go” and put it in a 12 ounce paper cup! You might as well spit in a glass and give it to me. At the two local Starbucks, I have walked in and clearly and cheerfully asked for a “for-here doppio” (double-shot of espresso in a porcelain demitasse) and they proceed to brew it into the paper cup. Can you stop and listen to me? This is not a 20 ounce chug of coffee that I am going to stroke all day and reheat in a microwave everytime the temperature drops below a certain temperature (insert wretching sounds here). This is something that I want to drink while walking out the door. By the time I get to the front of the store, I want to drop off the demitasse in that black tub where patrons put their used glassware (don’t get me started on the need to bus our own table). It is very simple since THAT IS WHAT THE WORD ESPRESSO MEANS - FAST!
I understand that in the grand scheme of things, when the universe begins to collapse on itself, my little rant about coffee will not mean that much but neither will reading about it in my blog.
Thanks for listening.