10 Things You Don’t Know and Don’t Care About Me

Posted by danleone on August 7th, 2006 filed in blogging, funny, scepticism, uncategorized

1. I am an atheist. God simply does not exist. Any argument that doesn’t address “first cause” is not an argument. No books, no “authorities” in the name of pastors, ministers, priests etc, no mythological stories and no quasi-historical figures can be factored into the equation. BUT, believe it or not, I am not an angry atheist. I was never touched by a priest. God was not the cause of 9-11 and he is not the solution. I have to, and do, accept that others believe differently. In fact many of these people are those that I love and respect dearly. But, in my little head, the sentence “I believe in god” is exactly equivalent to “I believe in giant purple bunnies living in my butt.” Hard for me to wrap my head around it. I am not trying to be arrogant or smug; simply stating some relevant and not interesting stuff about me. My opinion until I change it.

2. I cannot tolerate superstitions (reduntant, as I don’t see much difference between 1 and 2. From the ubiquitous “god bless you” when someone sneezes to baseball players wearing the same socks for “good luck.” I would happily walk under a ladder with an open umbrella while breaking thirteen mirrors, stepping on a sidewalk crack and watching a black cat prance by me in order to prove it to you.

3. There is very little room in my world for people who believe in the supernatural. There is no astrology, no psychic ability, no afterlife, no soul, no aliens visiting from outer space, no John Edwards and his ilk, no palmistry, numerology, tarot and no telekinesis. There is no such thing as good or bad luck or fate. The problem is that I lose a bit of respect for people that do believe in that junk.

4. Despite all the above, this will be the first time I admit that I cried when I walked into the Vatican about 8 years ago. I am still stunned by the majesty of it all. I was transfixed by the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel and my favorite work of art is Mozart’s Requiem. All beautiful expressions of HUMAN creativity and NOT divine inspiration.

5. If, huge if, I were smarter and 20 years old, I would be studying astronomy or mathematics.

6. Much less dramatic: I hate balloons. I think I fear them. I hate when the kids have a birthday party and I need to blow them up. I cringe at the mere thought of the sound and fear the snapping rubber hitting my face when it explodes. My kids hate it because my balloons are wimpy 6 inches in diameter.

7. I NEVER EVER read the fortune in a fortune cookie. No good reason other than it is pointless. Interestingly, there are many other “pointless” things I do in life, so I am not sure why the need to make a statement with fortune cookies.

8. I am a bleeding heart Liberal and am still stunned that people voted for, and still defend, George Bush.

9. I pay attention to sports just barely enough to allow me a chance at a resaonable conversation.

10. I used to be a raw food vegan and when I was, I never felt better physically. I ran 4 of my 5 marathons as a vegan and never had so much energy. I even miss it. BUT, I am a million miles and 50 pounds away from those days. Food is an addiction, just as cigarette smoking is.

and one more for good luck:

11. I can’t stand practial jokes. I don’t care if they happen to me, but I hate setting people up or watching people get set up. I do not watch Candid Camera, Punk’d, or that show where people try to get themselves fired. In fact, this has been to my detriment because it also means that I hate giving surprise parties. It is not that a joke is bad in and of itself or mean-spirited, it is I hate seeing people in a state if unknowing while the rest of the world does know. I really do not know the psychology of it all but I bet it could be interesting.